Smile
by Solitary Dragon
Summary: As Trowa emerges in his new career and life having left Quatre behind; Quatre struggles with their break up.
1. Chapter 1

_Why can't you just admit it, Quatre? I outgrew you._

"Hey Quat! Can you believe it? Here I was driving down Del Mar and BAM larger than life Trowa's face is plastered on a billboard for Bleu de CHANEL! Don t ask what I was doing in San Diego but our pal Trowa is definitely big news. He sure has made a name for himself - well an assumed name. I hear he's going by the alias Triton Bloom these days, who could have guessed Trowa - a model." Duo's voice gushed and gurgled with mirth as Quatre strained to pay attention. Nimble fingers flicked through paperwork and scrawled elegant signatures on dotted lines as Quatre grimaced, fighting hard to keep a smile on his face.

"Well Quat, I don t mean to hold you up. I just wanted to give you a ring-a-ding and catch up. I've been earthside for quite some time and I guess I just miss space. I'm not naive you know-" Scrambling to collect his thoughts, Quatre's reply failed to convey the right amount of surprise.

"Huh? Duo I," He paused, did it make sense to deny his pain.

"If this is painful for you Quat just say so, I know that you and Trowa-"

"I don t want to talk about this right now Duo." Quatre's eyes twitched upward as he tried to convince himself and Duo he no longer felt the same aching pain since Trowa left. "I'm fine, really. I m happy that Trowa - Triton is successful. It's what he wanted."

"Quat," Duo began but thought better of it as he gracefully slide the car's steering wheel beneath tanned hands. "One day we're gunna exercise those demons, you try to hide from me. I want you to know that I m here for you and even though you think 2 years is a long time, when you love someone it never truly goes away."

"Don't say that Duo, I have to hope. I have to hope that one day when I wake up I don't miss him. He's not a part of my life anymore and I need to get over it I'm tired of crying all the time and I just - I just," plaintive murmurs left Quatre's lips before Alcide knock interrupted them both.

"My apologies Mr. Winner, the GM is here to see you regarding the acquisition of Helion Company. He wants to discuss the current state of bidding and provide some possible projections."

Pursing his lips together Quatre responded, "It's 13:20 have him set up in the board room I will be there shortly, thank you Alcide."

"Very corporate, Mr. Winner." Duo's devilish smirk and remark seemed to revive some part of Quatre as he laughed along.

"Oh Duo, how I wish it were that glamorous. Between the endless meetings, paper cuts and final drafts I hardly fit the bill of a young successful corporate Mr. Winner."

"That's a lie! You know for a FACT you're on the Fortune 500 watch list, easily the most eligible bachelor in space and a looker to boot!" Duo's easy charm and friendly flirting seemed to lift both their spirits as Quatre responded with mock surprise.

"Why Duo! I had no idea you carried a torch for me?!" Peals of laughter came through Quatre's phone as Duo tilted back his long elegant neck and roared with delight.

"Keep your eyes on the road DUO!" Quatre squealed as tears of joy overtook him.

"Oh Quat, I really do miss you. How long has it been?"

"It's been forever Duo but if we start reminiscing I'll never make it to my meeting!"

"Do me a favor before you go Quat, take a moment to just breathe."

Puzzled by this sudden turn in conversation, Quatre smiled and said his goodbye to Duo's radiant face. Sighing to himself, Quatre thought 'I wish I could be just like you Duo, smiling always smiling.'


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh! C'est bien! My, Triton you have done wonderful work today, I'm very impressed. I will run these directly to post production. I think our client will be happy with the concept. It was wonderful working with you – usually models are so difficult."

Shrugging his brown parka on Trowa failed to respond to Arnaud the director's gentle fawning.

"Perhaps dinner tonight? My treat." Arnaud's toothy leer melted as Trowa's green eyes bore holes into his face.

"Umm, it has been a long day Arnaud," Triton's assistant Cherie piped in from the sidelines, "besides Triton has another shoot in 3 hours. His schedule is pretty rigorous with New York Fashion Week looming we barely have time to wrap things up here in Nice before heading off to the US in a few more days to prepare for the catwalk. So much to do…" Cherie's babbling continued as the director nodded smiling dismissively.

"Another time then Triton, you simply must visit me, I'd love to have you."

"il faut que je pait." Triton replied as he turned to make his exit Trowa internally wished he could skulk off instead.

"Triton," Cherie began as her short legs fought to keep time with Trowa, "I know I'm just your assistant but please don't make things harder than they need to be. Everyone loves you here in France and I know part of your allure is your mystery but Arnaud could easily make or break your career."

"Cherie." A warning lashed out from Trowa's thin lips silencing Cherie's pleas.

"Right." Quickly Cherie seemed to seize her words before continuing, "We have approximately 3 hours to get to Valmonde's cover shoot in Marseille and once that's finished we are taking a flight to Heathrow. I believe we have an interview scheduled with Newland a former BBC correspondent turned fashion rogue. I'm so sorry you've been overbooked but you did agree to this interview and I'm hoping you can get a few hours sleep before we get there. I think it would be fair to warn you that Newland is no push over and I hope that our preparations for this interview last week are still fresh in your mind."

Turning his mind to the task, Trowa slipped into the sleek black chauffeured Audi waiting by the curb and closed his eyes. The next few hours would be a blur and being this busy meant he had no time to think of Quatre; he hardly had time to think of himself.

"Welcome back to our viewers and if you're now joining us we have a treat for you in the shape of Triton Bloom. He has taken the fashion world by storm and now this international man of mystery is here in London giving up the goods in his first ever televised interview. Well don't we feel special?" British snobbery at its best Trowa thought, and here I thought I'd left this crap behind with Quatre.

"Now for a moment of truth – Triton Bloom, I know you have reservations about posing nude for Vogue but it's a tremendous honor. It's come to us from inside sources that your scars are a bit of an issue. I think seeing scars on a model will rejuvenate and mirror life. Here we are, as a global sphere in a post war phase and it would be a wonderful type of advocacy if you could step forward – this is the point where high fashion and life meet. There is a certain level of realism in art and fashion and it can't be mimicked. I think you could make history with this shoot for Vogue."

"I'm just a canvas." Trowa's muted reply seemed to upset the interviewer as much as his cool glances over sunglasses. Trowa has whorled onto the set, sitting through a few dustings in makeup and sound check before he took a seat on an overstuffed sofa with his sunglasses on. Elaborately arranging his long limbs to appear relaxed and at ease Trowa allowed himself to appear aloof even bored. This persona Triton Bloom was a simple shell, a kind of unaffected autopilot and it worked for Trowa. Triton didn't seem to feel, didn't seem to have emotion and it was acceptable possibly even revered.

"Uhh" the interviewer seemed stunned by Trowa's lack of response but recovered quickly, "You're definitely an in demand canvas. Has it been all you expected working with such huge names in the business?"

"It's been okay." Splaying long fingers on the arms of the sofa, Trowa took a moment to inspect each digit as they seemed novel in some way.

Quatre's eyes crinkled softly as he watched Trowa's interview, 'Still the same Trowa, no matter how many times you change your name,' Quatre thought, 'you're still the same.'

"I wanted to spend a moment talking about your past Triton, you seemed to come from nowhere and everyone is scrambling for your back story. Where did you come from, who is Triton Bloom really?"

"I'm just a guy." a timid smile blinked across Trowa's face barely registering.

Oh Trowa, Quatre's heart ached, without meaning to the pale tips of Quatre's fingers brushed the screen.

"Mr. Winner," shattered the reverie of Quatre's thoughts as he watched Trowa on the monitor over his desk.

"DAMMIT Alcide! I've HAD IT up to HERE! What!? WHAT DO YOU WANT now!"

"My- my- my," Alcide stammered, "I'm sorry your sister is on line 3. I'm not sure which one …"

"Quatre Raberba! What's all that yelling about!" Querulous blue eye glared at him in place of Trowa's stormy green as his sister's face replaced what Quatre has previously been watching. "Be a dutiful brother and pay attention, since you are technically the head of this family – it's time you thought about our family's future. I'm not trying to pressure you but it's been 2 years. We all loved Trowa…"

"No you didn't Ilene. No one in this family liked Trowa or supported our relationship."

"He was an urchin Quatre. I mean honestly I want to see you happy, we all do and that's why this party is going to be the perfect opportunity for you to finally get back out there. I don't want us to have a fight, I'm your older sister and I want what's best for you."

'Trowa is what's best for me,' Quatre thought but he remained silent as his sister prattled on.

"Duo is going to be there, I personally invited him – it's no easy feat tracking that kid down but I did it and he's going to be here soon. Even if you're not thrilled by the prospect of dating again, at least come see Duo. I know that it's going to take you some time to wrap things up on the main cluster so you have 1 week to get your affairs in order, hope a shuttle and be at the mansion by Tuesday next week – 7 days is all you get. It's going to be a serious soiree."

"You've been planning this for weeks haven't you." Quatre's defeat was sealed.

"Yes, actually it's a bit of everything I suppose. There will be a wide cross section of people, not the usual stuffy colony affair. I think … well I don't want to give it away but we will have some visitors from earth attending."

"Dignitaries?" Quatre mused.

"GOD no! It would be a snore-fest for sure. Buck up Quatre I promise you'll enjoy yourself!"


	3. Chapter 3

"I thought there wouldn't be any dignitaries here!" Quatre's easy smile and winning hand shake gripped Wufei's as they both seemed genuinely pleased to see each other.

"How I manage to get invited to these things, I'll never know but being head of the Long Clan has its advantages I suppose." Wufei certainly had stayed busy after the end of the war. Wufei had an insanely decorated post military career with the Preventers. When he wasn't on assignment he found the time to attend university where he graduated with his masters in political science and after an early retirement from active duty with the Preventers he sat at the head of L5's delegation. Duty above all else was what Wufei stood for and as he mingled among the glittering lights Wufei seemed completely at ease. 'Talk about overachievers,'Quatre thought, 'my, how things have changed. I could remember a time when Wufei wouldn't be caught dead at a formal event.'

Ilene's soiree proved to be what Quatre expected, the usually suspects although there were some new faces. Gliding effortlessly towards Quatre, Ilene appeared with someone familiar and at the same time distant on her arm.

"I wanted to introduce you to someone," smiling politely Quatre extended his arm, "Quat, this is Triton Bloom, he seems to have crashed our little party."

Time froze and in that moment Quatre wasn't quite sure what to do, should he scream, should he cry or should he laugh at the irony of the situation. Pulling pink lips together Quatre did exactly what he was taught to do, "It's a pleasure, I hope you enjoy the party. Please excuse me." Spinning on his heels Quatre walked stiffly through the crowd to the arched balcony. Quatre wanted desperately to escape the crush of polite society but dashing off in a fit of tears wouldn't send the right message. Suppressing this urge Quatre tugged at the collar of his stark white button down as he took in the garden and smiled at fellow party goers who had fanned out onto the balcony to enjoy the immense Winner estate. How could he be so cruel to show up here after so long. It was obvious poor Ilene had no idea who Triton was and somehow she seemed not to guess that Triton and Trowa were one in the same. Then again Ilene had only heard about Trowa from the other Winner sisters, she had never actually met him.

"Could we talk?" the breath which these words travelled on tickled Quatre's ear as he turned surprised to find Trowa had followed him.

As though in a daze Trowa palmed Quatre's arm effortlessly steering him through the maze of party goers, to an anteroom and finally up a long column of stairs. Shuffling with some effort Quatre found himself in their old wing. As they stood side by side in their old bedroom Quatre couldn't keep his blood from freezing as the memories flooded his senses. How long had it been since he came up here. A heavy sheen of dust clung to the table tops since Quatre's last visit. In a fit of rage Quatre had forbidden the wait staff from entering to clean perhaps in the mad hope of preserving what little of Trowa remained.

Presently, the cupid's bow of Trowa's lips opened, quivered and closed; that was all it took. Gazing up from his lips to his nose and finally falling into green eyes Quatre's fingers tracked the same hungry journey his eyes had taken. Clasping the soft brown turf of Trowa's hair, Quatre swallowed audibly unsure of his intentions and thoughts. Pressed together so intimately it was easy to forget the past hurt, the arguments, the yelling and all the time they'd lost. Nestled against Trowa's chest the tinkling of champagne flutes and laughter from downstairs seemed so distant. Fingers slid seamlessly through blonde locks as loving lips nudged at the crown of Quatre's golden crown.

"Oh Tro," broke the spell, as Quatre seemed to recover himself before pulling away. "You outgrew me remember? You can't just show up and expect me to fall back into your arms."

"I don't want to fight Quat, I missed you."

"It's been two years! Why are you doing this now?"

"Please, try to understand how it felt to be me. For once in your life Quat, stop being a spoilt little brat."

It was the suddenness of motion, the aching in his right hand that told Quatre more than anything he'd struck Trowa. A deep reddish bruise bloomed on Trowa's cheek and Quatre immediately regretted the action.

"Get out! I don't want to see you again. I don't want your explanation, I don't want your excuses, I just want you to leave! You couldn't wait to leave me before so why have you come back! Get out!" Dissolving into tears Quatre sank to the floor in a puddle of grief before a firm thudding sounded at the door. As the door opened chestnut tresses whipped back and forth as soft foot falls approached and strong arms pulled Quatre to his feet.

"Tri-Trowa I think you better leave. Come on Quat, leave the hysterics for someone like Relena. You're a gundam pilot, the best one I know…even Heero thought so."

Smiling weakly through his tears, Quatre clung to Duo; he was happy to see his friend but no so happy to be seen like this.

"I'm sorry you have to see me like this,"Quatre began.

"Shut up Blonde not one more word of apology out of you. Somehow I knew you needed me. I don't know why you let yourself get worked up like this. We faced the full force of Khushrenda, that Psycho Zechs Merquise and let's not forget Wufei. Who could put up with Wufei's epic ranting. You dealt with all that and we still managed to save the world! But now look at you letting an Armani loafers wearing, three words per sentence Trowa-Triton-Barton-Bloom make you cry."

The smile which broke across Quatre's teary face was instantaneous and infectious, Duo smiled back weakly at first but was beaming by the end. Through the tears Quatre smiled and even managed a laugh.

"It's called tough love Quat and I'm here to dispense it with a smile."

"Why do I feel like I'm dying inside?" Quatre murmured barely moving his lips.

"You're learning to let him go Quat." Hugging Quatre firmly Duo spared no thought to Trowa-Triton-Barton-Bloom who was making a hasty exit through the haze of party-goers ignoring puzzled looks as he blew past.


End file.
